You: The Individual
Remember playing make-believe when you were younger?
It was a great way to become something else, like a magical being with superpowers who could fly and be invisible at will.
Make-believe might be something you’re still playing, only this time it’s pretending like everything is okay, you’re fine and you don’t actually feel those “negative emotions” (“because who wants to hear about those anyway?”, you say).
But underneath all the make believe is a person who doesn’t really feel okay.
Playing the part of the people pleaser and self-deprecating adult has become more taxing than you had imagined. In fact, what you really would like to do is to be able to tell someone just how much you’re suffering, but all of the someone’s out there don’t seem to really understand.
That’s why you’re here, isn’t it? Most of my clients start off this way. Taking a peek at a therapy website because something in their life doesn’t feel right, and they’re ready to finally start the process of taking the mask off and being the real them.
“But what if it all goes to shit? What if people won’t like me when I embrace my real self?”
“You don’t understand…if you really knew me, you’d reject me too”.
“I can’t show you my feelings…they’re too much and you’ll feel overwhelmed by them. Then you’ll just be another person who can’t help me”
These thoughts and attitudes are something I’m very familiar with. I get them.
They come from a very real place and more than likely, at one point, a person whom you trusted made you feel like a total pariah for being the real you and for expressing your feelings and needs.
Here’s the thing though: Those people don’t get to have a say anymore in how you are “supposed to be”.
It doesn’t have to be this way if you don’t want it.
You might be feeling really overwhelmed at the idea of coming to therapy and beginning this process.
I’d like to let you in on a little secret: Therapy is nerve wracking…at first. But after about 3 sessions, you’ll start to feel a little more comfortable and you’ll see that I’m not going to ridicule you for how you feel, what you think, or what you do.
In fact, you’ll likely see someone who cares so much about your wellbeing and who will make sure that your feelings and needs come first.
I know from my fulfilling years working as a therapist, that exploring these parts of yourself can bring up some powerful anxiety, resistance, and a mixture of excitement and dread (I’m guessing one or all of those is flaring up right now, eh?).
I’d like to help you get through that so you can have fulfilling relationships, set healthy boundaries for yourself without guilt (in fact, you and “no” might just become best friends), and finally recognize that you’ve been good enough this whole time.